Feeling Frazzled?.....What to put first?
Why do so many of us feel frazzled these days? we all seem to want to cram so much in, the irony is technology has freed up so much time for us, we now search around filling our time with things so we can feel meaningful and productive!! My children's Great Grandmother (who is 100), lived her life as a housewife, she has had a great life and has only just had to succumb (much to her chagrin) to having carer's in to help her out. The things she misses are simple things....cooking for herself, cleaning her own house, going to church and gardening....these were the activities that her generation took pride in. Now as a women I feel like a failure if I'm not a perfect wife, housewife, domestic goddess, cook, cleaner, parent, educator....oh and I must have a good job and fulfilling career...this must all be topped of with hobbies.....sports, crafts whatever you like!! Why not chuck in some of your own handmade Christmas decorations and homemade cookies for the school fete and you're a winner!
I know my drinking came from a deep rooted sense of fear and not feeling good enough, I believe I was born with this, however if I wanted to nurture this then there is plenty of stuff out there to feed this negativity. Today I have to remind myself that life is progress not perfection, that there will be steps forward and back, that no matter what I think I see around me...most folk are dealing with something...be it, fear, anger, sadness, grief, financial insecurity, anxiety, depression, physical illness etc etc, this is life. Sometimes good, sometimes bad...but today I don't need drink to fix myself. However, like most people I use other things to fix me, shopping, eating, over exercising....what am I trying to prove...what are we all trying to prove...that we can do it all? why? Easy does it. Life is bloody long :)
Here's some tips for taking it easy!
Choose what's the most important thing to do today? (for me if I'm struggling, I write down all the things I have achieved that day....no matter how trivial...rather than focusing on what I didn't do!)
Keep it simple..... learn to say NO! to things you don't really want to attend if you don't need to.
Drink plenty of water, fill a jug with water and cucumber and keep it in the fridge....refreshing!
Take Multi vitamins. especially B's and Iron if you feel run down.
Magnesium, there is lots of research to show this helps with depression, anxiety and tiredness. Get on it!
Exercise....always try and find time to fit this in, the endorphins is releases is worth the effort.
Spend time with people who make you happy.
Eat well (I am guilty of failing at this) but a good, balanced diet leads to a healthy happy you.... and there's more books/info than you can shake a stick at to help you with this.
Take time out for yourself ........... and DON'T feel guilty. As a mother this can be hard.
Get outdoors, cycle, walk, run in the sunshine (if there is any!)
Have a routine...I try to keep a routine to my life, I know its not always possible, but this allows time for the things that make you feel good.
My life is busy like others, some people cope with busyness and stress better than others, I have to know when I've reached my limit, if I'm frazzled and not sleeping properly my depression, alcoholism and anxiety can come up and grab me. Looking after yourself is so important. We feel guilty putting ourselves first, but what use am I to my kids, employers, friends, family and so on if i'm wither drunk or in a deep depression.
I know realistically in todays world we can't pick and choose the majority of our days activities (unless you win the lottery :) .....however chasing money and external stuff to make ourselves happy can have the adverse effect.....depending on the person I guess. I believe we can all find peace and happiness only from inside ourselves, the external stuff (money, clothes, cars, shoes, looks etc) is just gives you an outside shine. Saying all this I'm guilty of thinking every item of clothes I see and love will solve all my problems ;) as I said progress not perfection.....
Take care of yourself this week. lots of love